Breaking Free

She looks around
Sees the same old shit
Hears the same old shit
From dusk 'til dawn
Whatever time is
She defies it with head held high
Looking all aorund her
Deep within her
Staring into the smoke
That dark smoke...a veil
Like sand blinding to our spirit
She rips through the veil
Through the lies, sorrow and sadness
With tears and cries aloud
To the sky above
"Ain Soph! Save me! Show me the path!"
Fading isn't so bad....
Where no one can really see
But all shall hear
Oh yes...ALL shall hear

©'07 J.P.

But You Don't See Me

Silent smile Adorn's her face
Blinded are others who see no trace
You sit there doing what you will
Yet, here she remains still
As you seem to skip over her
Laugh and smile at those who SWOON all over you daily

Like was said she is just here
An ornament on the wall of your life
Put away when tired maybe?

She weeps so deep inside
Building up to explode
Wits end of daily life
With no one there to hold
No one to be held by
She IS alone

Who holds her up, as she cries herself to sleep in the rain?
Who holds her up, as she is bestowed by more pain?
Who wipes away the tears spilled even when you are away

Dance on her grave
Sing on her corpse
Break her reflection more

©'07 J.P.

This One

In your dark eyes
I know but realize
I do not need to
Know what you say is true
Search my soul again
No beginning nor end
Touch who I really am
The longing kills me
The longer I cannot see
T'is bad enough I feel so alone
The spirit which is me
I cannot condone
The way things exist
How long will all of this persist?
A tease to only breathe your kiss
To hold your hand, taunting
This like a dream, haunting
TAKE ME
TAKE ME
I beg of thee
SAVE ME
Is there anyone
To hear the cries of those alone?

©'07 J.P.

THE ESSENCE OF NOTHING

AS ONE SOUNDLY SLEEPS
ANOTHER SILENTLY WEEPS
ALONE, IN THE COLD
DARKNESS, WITH FIENDS SO BOLD
WHERE MONSTERS TORMENT
UNKNOWN OUTCOME TORRID

NOW IS THE MOMENT OF TRUTH
TRUTH DEFINITELY SICKENING, UNCOUTH
THE STENCH OF LIES AND DECEIT POUR
IN THE LAND WHICH DWELLS THAT FUCKING WHORE

©'07 J.P.

Max Beckman

The King
1934-37
Oil on canvas
53 1/4 x 39 1/4 in.
St. Louis Art Museum

Awhile ago last year, went to the art gallery here in St. Louis.
In the mid section of the Gallery, turned the corner...and THERE
HE WAS! Dark, symbolic like a dream about to step from the
shadows. "The King" by Max Beckman. Beckman, who was
exhiled by the Nazi's in Germany.

Well, since that day, where I was drawn and sucked into
Beckman's world, whenever I'd visit the Museum, I just HAD
to visit this piece! I mean WOW! Something about it. Dark,
and mysterious!

"Choose your King"

But today, he wasn't there. I scoured the various exhibits, and floors...
But MY KING wasn't anywhere to be found! I asked like 3 museum
affiliates, and was finally directed on the right path. He was
taken down, but they weren't sure for how long, since they sometimes
rotate the art.

Went to the information desk, and was then directed to the Museum
Library. Where FINALLY I was able to find out where the piece
went to! He was on loan. A vacation of sorts. On his way to
Munich, where he will be displayed until 2008. I was also fed
information on this painting that wasn't presented with it in such
great detail. And learned about Mr. Beckman as well. I also obtained
both a B&W and a color print of this piece *sigh*. The affiliates there
were also gracious enough to copy this information, on both The King
and the artist, Max Beckman.

Now I can look at him all I want. He reminds me of someone, and
no one all at once. Cannot explain. OH!!! I also learned Beckman
had done 2 versions of this piece. And there are definate differences
indeed. I can see why he didn't really like his first version, although it
is also good. The second finished work is FAR more in depth,
and I LOVE it more.

Today may have had some small bumps, but this part of the day
made it better somehow for me. Although I couldn't see the painting
face-to-face today, at least I was able to view it, and learn about
it and it's artist all in one shot! Also sent me thinking more deeply
about life. Don't know why...it just did.

Whew! Now....looking forward to BIGGER and better things.

Hope my baby had a good day (My Eternity). If not, at least
somewhat. And hope everyone elses day goes well too.

When It Rains, It Pours

Once upon a time, there was happiness in all aspects.
Then something happened. Things change ya know?!
Change can be both good/bad, but sometimes even when
things look bad....they must be for a better reason. Right?

I know we had to leave the Silent Hill of doom. It was a push
for the better. So then....why do I weep like this? What is
wrong with me? I look into your eyes, and see the emotion pour
with the words you speak, "I Love You". Oh how my heart aches!!
To wonder when again, will I be able to hold you forever in my
arms again. To feel the warmth of you. Your touch which
calms my inner being....MY SOUL. OUR SOULS as one! I miss you
already!! Why would that be so bad? It is not you know.

I need you because of all the reasons you've made me happy and
more. I need you because there is no other you! And no other
will ever make me feel the way you have and still do. I need
you, so I can always feel your love, pain, happiness and joy.
Take away all of the pain and sadness together!! Be joyous and
happy together. Where no one else can EVER replace what we have!
This and more, are the reasons WHY I NEED YOU.....MY LOVE!

Always and forever,
Your Love